Definition Of Love

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I know I'm young and it might sound funny when I talk about love, cause my definition of love keeps changing. I fall harder each time and love intensely than the last time. My definition of love was once you, had myself thinking it couldn't grow any more stronger and gave it my all. Let me tell you this, you were the hardest thing to walk away from. It took a lot of what was remaining of me to fix my broken smile but I still couldn't let go of everything. I carry the bitterness inside me, a burden for the next guy who comes my way to bear when I can't let myself go bare.

It's not easy, cause every-time he asks why I don't say 'I love you' back often, how do I tell him I try my hardest not to call out your name. When he asks why I'm never interested to talk about the future, I cannot tell him I've spent hours together thinking about our future just to watch it shatter like a glass that cut me deep and watched me bleed. He will never understand why I act like I have a split personality, cause one second I tell him I can't do without him with warmest hug and the very next second push him away with the coldest stare.

I look at him from the passenger side, I've looked at someone that way before and I can't help but wonder if he's looked at someone this way before as well. Told someone the same things he tells me now, someone that gave him her all, someone that once saw a future with him. Wonder if he's the reason behind her indecisiveness now, if he was once her definition of love and now she's just another me.

I can't fix the past now, all's well that ends well, so I hope the best for everyone, for the clouds to clear for a brighter sunshine. I hope that one day when I wake up, things won't effect me anymore, when I look at him I'll only see him, he only sees me. I hope for him to be my definition of love and never change.

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